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When You Realize You are Who You Always Wanted to Be

Over the years, I've envied a handful of women—a couple of musicians and bloggers. All talented, beautiful, smart, financially independent, and well-traveled, these ladies had a life I could only dream of and desperately longed for. If you combine this envy with long-held dreams of living in an exotic, exciting locale, and a miserable, poverty-stricken life, you have one desperate woman. The regret over my life choices hung over me like a dark, ominous cloud. The funny thing about regret is that if it sits under the skin too long, it turns into things like depression, worthlessness, poor decision-making, and even anger. In turn, those things can lead you to turn to easy fixes; such as drinking, eating, or whatever your pick of poison is. It's a vicious cycle that feels endless and impossible to escape.  In 2018, I began to realize that if my life was going to change then I needed to change. It all started and ended with me, as far as my life was concerned, and I needed to fix i...

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